I Can't Feel A Thing
by Selfless-Touched-Storyteller
Summary: Tag: 6x18 Lauren . "No, Emily! Stay with me!" Morgan's thoughts when he finds Emily lying on the floor, broken and bleeding. His POV, but the entire team is included.


_...Morgan?  
>I'm right here. You're going to be alright. Stay with me, baby. Come on, stay with me!<br>Let me go...  
>No, no; I am <em>_not__ letting you go. Listen to me, I know why you did all of this. I know what you did for Declan. And I am so proud of you. Do you understand that? I am __proud__ of you because you are my friend, and you are my partner. No, __**Emily**__! Come on. Stay with me! If you can hear me, __**please**__, just squeeze my hand…_

* * *

><p>Her eyes closed, and her hand relaxed in mine.<p>

_Please, please, Em…don't leave me._

I brushed my spare hand across her neck, feeling for a pulse.

_Damn it!_

"Medic!"

_She needs help, __**NOW**__!_

* * *

><p>*THUMP*<p>

…

*THUMP*

* * *

><p>Faint beats against my fingers—<em>still alive…still alive.<em>

Suddenly, a foreign voice from somewhere in the dark.

"Here!"

_Thank god._

A uniformed man kneeled on the ground in front of me and placed an oxygen mask on Emily's bruised and bloodied face.

*THUMP*

…

…

* * *

><p>…<p>

…

…

* * *

><p><em>NO!<em>

I couldn't feel it.

_C'mon, don't do this to me!_

_EMILY._

Her pulse was **gone**.

* * *

><p>I met the paramedic's eyes in a steel, hollow gaze.<p>

"**Save her."**

…

* * *

><p>"Agent Morgan, I'm going to start chest compressions. Breathe for her."<p>

He didn't wait for my answer and immediately began pressing his palms against her chest.

_One._

_Two._

…

* * *

><p>I placed my mouth on hers—<em>so cold<em>—and breathed out, pushing air into her lungs.

…

_C'mon…breathe, Em! Please, just __**breathe**__._

Seconds passed—still no change.

…

…

*THUMP*

* * *

><p>A small flutter of her chest, a tiny gasp for air.<p>

_Thank god._

* * *

><p>"Sir?"<p>

I clutched her cold hand tightly in my own, staring down at her broken form.

Her eyes remained closed, squeezed tight against the pain.

_I'm here for you, Prentiss._

"Agent Morgan!"

_What?_

My head snapped up, and I glared angrily at man across from me.

"Sir, we need to move her."

"Alright, but I'm coming with you."

* * *

><p>I stayed by her side as she was loaded into the waiting ambulance.<p>

I held her hand like it was a lifeline.

_**I will NEVER let you go.**_

* * *

><p>I took a seat inside the vehicle and immediately whipped out my cell.<p>

I dialed Hotch with my free hand.

*RING*

*RING*

"Hotchner."

"Hotch, it's Morgan. She's still alive. We're on our way to St. Jude's."

…

"We're on our way."

* * *

><p>After hanging up my phone, I stared down at the still form beside me.<p>

_Hold on… _

_I don't—I can't—__**you cannot die.**__ Do you hear me? Don't you __**dare**__ die on me._

_Not again._

Her eyes fluttered.

"Emily?"

...

Maybe I'd imagined it.

…

I looked away.

"M—Morgan…"

My head snapped back, and I found myself staring into her brown eyes.

_What do I say?_

"H—Hey, Princess…"

The corner of her mouth twitched—_was that a smile?_—and her eyes closed.

I let out a pent-up breath.

_You're okay…__**you're okay.**_

* * *

><p>Suddenly, a loud beeping noise filled the van.<p>

_DAMN IT; __**NO!**_

A team of paramedics shoved me aside as they rushed to Emily's aid.

My hand slipped from hers.

…

_**I let go.**_

…

* * *

><p>I couldn't breathe.<p>

_She_ couldn't breathe.

No air.

No words.

_There are no words for this._

* * *

><p>So many voices.<p>

Crowded, jumbled up in my head.

Shouts—screams—phrases.

Lost in the chaos of it all.

* * *

><p>Then, two words.<p>

_Two words_, and my world was sent into a raging downward spiral.

"**She's crashing!"**

…

* * *

><p>A single tone emitted from the monitor.<p>

*—*

…

* * *

><p><em><strong>No.<strong>_

...

* * *

><p><em>No.<em>

_No._

_No._

_No.  
><em>

_**NO.**_

* * *

><p>And then…<p>

Nothing.

No more sounds.

_No—more—sounds._

* * *

><p>I could see the people moving around me.<p>

But I could hear the voice of only **one** man.

The man with the paddles.

The single person who could save her life.

* * *

><p>"Charging!"<p>

…

"CLEAR!"

* * *

><p>…<p>

…

…

* * *

><p>*BEEP*<p>

My breath caught as I dared myself to hope.

…

*BEEP*

A tear slipped down my cheek and onto the metal floor.

...

*BEEP*

* * *

><p>The noises were back.<p>

They came back.

And I let them in.

One beep after the other.

**One, single beep.**

Followed by another.

And _another_.

* * *

><p>"Welcome back, Agent Prentiss."<p>

_Welcome back, Emily._

* * *

><p>4 MINUTES LATER.<p>

* * *

><p>I stood silently, watching as the paramedics rushed her into the hospital.<p>

I couldn't feel my legs.

One second, I was outside, shivering in the falling rain.

And suddenly, I was through the sliding-glass doors and inside the confines of the hospital.

Following my friend.

Because **I can't let her go.**

* * *

><p>"Derek..?"<p>

_They're here._

…

* * *

><p>3 HOURS LATER.<p>

* * *

><p>We'd be waiting for so long.<p>

And still no word on Agent Prentiss.

JJ had just left to interrogate the nurses.

**Still no word.**

* * *

><p>Reid paced back and forth, back and forth.<p>

Seaver had her head in her hands, still and silent.

Rossi was sitting, his head down, mouthing unspoken prayers.

Garcia sat beside me, wringing her hands together, sniffling as tears stained her cheeks red.

Hotch stared at the blank wall across the room, not moving, not saying a word.

But I barely even noticed.

* * *

><p>My thoughts were consumed with images.<p>

_Emily_, lying on the floor, a wooden stake **impaled through her stomach.**

_Emily_, telling me to **let her go.**

_Emily_, **coding** in the ambulance.

_Emily. Emily. __**Emily.**_

* * *

><p>1 HOUR LATER.<p>

* * *

><p>I couldn't take it anymore.<p>

We were all on edge, terrified for our friend.

I looked over at Rossi, who had his hand wrapped around a simple, gold cross.

I haven't prayed since the night Garcia got shot.

…

* * *

><p><em>God, if you are here—if you are really here—please.<em>

_If she dies._

_I don't—she just can't die._

_Make her be okay._

_Please, if you care at all, make her be okay._

_Make me believe again._

…

_**Please.**_

* * *

><p>And I don't know what happened after that.<p>

All I know is that it _hurts_.

* * *

><p>30 SECONDS EARLIER.<p>

* * *

><p>JJ walked into the room.<p>

Her eyes were blood-red and glistened with unshed tears.

Her lips trembled as she struggled to take a breath.

_No._

"**She never made it off the table."**

…

* * *

><p>After all of that—<p>

—that _bullshit_.

That _fucking_ _mess_.

After _everything_ we went through to get her back home.

And she's gone.

_**Gone.**_

Just like that.

* * *

><p><em>Just—like—that.<em>

* * *

><p><em><strong>Sixty seconds.<strong>_

_If I had just gotten there sixty seconds earlier, Emily might still be with us._

_...what am I supposed to do? _

_She was my __**friend.**_

_I lost my friend right in front of me..._

* * *

><p><strong>And I can't feel a thing.<strong>


End file.
